Thursday, 30 July 2015

Emotional Support


I’ve crashed and burned. I’ve lost all energy. I’ve given and helped too much.

There’s 2 people in my life that I love to bits that are both requiring emotional support and extra love right now. I’ve tried to be there in whatever capacity that I can but my body has decided enough is enough.

I love helping people, trying to help them through life and doing whatever is necessary to achieve that. But after crashing out for the 3rd time this year and having to rebuild strength each time, I’ve realised I can’t keep doing what I’m doing. I’m giving so much of my energy to others that I’ve left none for my husband or myself. Something has to change.

Last week I spent 4 days immobile, all I could do was watch telly and sleep, for a person who likes to move around this was tough. Over the 4 days I got to do a lot of thinking and processing. I came to the conclusion that these 2 beautiful people needed emotional support that I’m not equipped with. Doesn’t mean that I can’t give them emotional support it’s just the real support they need I’m unable to supply. I’m busting myself and running my health ragged doing a job I’m unable or equipped to do.

So what does this mean for them? Does it mean I give up on them?

No it doesn’t mean that at all, if anything it’s shown me that I can be there for them and help them but what they fully require someone else needs to do. It frees me up to know that I’m helping them only the way I can and I can’t be their full help. It shows them how they can rely on me and what I’m able to help with and then frees them up to search for the other missing pieces. By me trying to be all the pieces for them doesn’t help them at all, it makes them stagnant, it doesn’t help them move forward in life. I can only be part of the solution, part of the puzzle, part of their life, I can’t be the whole solution, the whole puzzle or the whole part. I’m part of the journey not the destination. I was taking some of their power away from them by trying to be the whole of everything and by doing so was taking all the power out of me.

It’s amazing what you learn when you’re hit to the ground. I can still be their friend and continue to help them along their journey but I can’t do it for them or give them everything they require. They need to find others or something else that can do what I cannot.

Do you support others too much sometimes? How do you balance it out? 

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Friday, 24 July 2015

101 in 1001 days process update

It's been 3.5 months since starting my newest 101 things in 1001 days list and I've been so happy that I've already crossed off 6 items and made a good start on a 7th, ahhh I can't believe it, I'm actually achieving something - woo hoo!!

#15 - Buy a New Car (13/06/15)

Sadly my poor little Stewie had seen better days and was needing an upgrade. After nearly colliding with a bus on the motorway at 100km due to old brake pads, the time had well and truly come.

As much as I loved Stewie (he was my first car and all) I'm absolutely smitten with Marcy. She slick, red, aircon, comfy cars, bluetooth, I feel like I've hit the jackpot. Thank goodness for end of financial year specials and doing some research we got her at a great bargain price.


#26 - Go to Supernova (20/06/15)

We didn't go last year, so we made sure we got there this year. We are so geeky and just love events like this, it's where all lovers of cartoons, fantasy, comics can join forces and indulge in all things awesome. 


#37 - Make a Death Star Cake (23/05/15)

I love a good challenge and my brother-in-law likes to see what I can come up with. So this year for his 26th birthday he asked if I could recreate the infamous Death Star in cake form (last year he asked for Zelda). Challenge Accepted!!! I was quite happy with the end result and it was made even more fun when we presented him with the cake while playing the Star Wars Death March theme. 


#46 - Take my nephew (6) on a city adventure (3/7/15)

I love hanging out with my nephew, you get to act crazy and silly and no one cares. These school holidays I volunteered to help out my sister-in-law while she worked and took my oldest nephew (6) out on a city adventure. We had the most fun, we went to the Australian Musuem, St Mary's Cathedral, Hype Park and of course I got tricked (not really) into buying ice-cream. Next school holidays he wants to go bowling. 


#51 - Dress up for Disney On Ice (11/07/15)
#66 - Make a Snow White Outfit (11/07/15)

I was able to combined these two into one event, which was super fun. Every year my mum and I go and watch Disney on Ice but as my nephew and niece have gotten older we've now been bringing them along for the ride. This year my niece (3) was old enough to bring along so of course (no convincing necessary) I had to dress up. My nephew wasn't at all keen to join in on the dressing up but Little One was up for it, wearing her beautiful Elsa dress while I using clothes from my wardrobe dressed up as Snow White. I think this is going to become a new tradition every year now. 


I'm also making great process on #21 Read 15 books - I'm a slow reader but I've already powered through 4 books so far in only 3 months and I'm nearly finished a 5th, I'm quite shocked but also impressed. 

There is such a great feeling attached to crossing items off the list but I'm really enjoying the process this time so much more than last time. I want to do these things instead of feeling like I have to. 

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Monday, 20 July 2015

Tips for Happy Winter Feet

This post is sponsored by Scholl but all opinions are my own. 


Seriously whoever upset Elsa please say sorry.

I’m normally a big fan of winter but this year in Australia it’s been extra cold and I’ve been struggling to stay warm. I know there’s a lot of other countries that are colder in winter than us but it does feel like we’ve been transported into an eternal winter of Elsa proportions.

When my feet get cold the rest of me follows in suit, so I’ve been trying to find ways to thaw my toes out and keep them toasty, so I want to share with you five tips on how to get happy winter feet.

Tip One – Foot Soak:

There’s nothing a good foot soak won’t fix. All you need is a bucket that your feet can fit in, some warm water and a few drops of lavender oil (if you own a foot spa they’re good too). While relaxing catch up on a good book or a good show. I've been taping Season 2 of Scandal on Soho and I'm so love with Fitz and Liv – anyone else watch Scandal? 


Tip Two – Mini Pedi

After the foot soak while your skin is soft, scrub all the dead skin (ewww) off your feet. You can do this with a blade on a pair of scissors or a file. I found the Scholl Velvet Smooth Express Pedi is much quicker and easier plus feels like a mini massage for your feet. Rub in some good moisture cream (I used Velvet Smooth Moisture Cream) and a good lick of nail polish, will leave you feeling smooth and relaxed.

Tip Three – Comfy shoes

I struggle to find comfortable shoes, I mainly live in sneakers and uggs during winter but I do love to feel a bit dressy now and then. To make my shoes extra comfy I’ve started using gel inserts to help with heel pain plus I can swap them between shoes - bonus!


Tip Four – Foot massage

See if you can bribe your partner into giving you a foot massage while you sit back, read a magazine and sip some hot tea (ha ha - well I can dream can’t I?)

Instead give yourself a gentle foot massage using some moistening cream, slip on some cozy bed socks and crawl into bed with a cuppa and a magazine. 


Tip Five – Keep warm

Keeping your feet warm is the best way to keep them and you happy. Cozy socks, heaters, boots and blankets are what winter is made of.

Do you have any tips to share on how you keep warm during winter? 

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Friday, 17 July 2015

Can Happiness and Anger co-exist?


Yes they can as you can’t have one without the other. 

You can’t know joy without knowing pain, peace without chaos, love without hate, and you can’t know happiness without despair.

So how does anger and happiness co-exist? When you open up and allow room for both to be in your life, you can still experience anger without it taking away happiness from your life.

Lately I’ve been experiencing a lot of anger, so much so it’s been taking over every fibre of my being and consuming my every thought. I pushed it aside for days, weeks even until it overtook so much of my thought processes I was getting headaches, dizziness and my sleeping was even more wacked out than normal. I prayed and keep being told the same thing – “journal”. After several days of this I finally did what I was told (about time I know God) and journaled my anger out. Oh my gosh - the release that occurred was almost instantaneous, my headaches/dizziness eased and I slept soundly for the first night in ages.

I’m still angry over the issues that are affecting me but I found a way to release my anger and still enjoy happiness in other areas of my life, by allowing the anger to be there and not fearing it but just letting it be a part of me and not pushing it away. That’s the biggest problem, I was fearing the anger, I kept pushing it down and down, hoping it would go away only to find it getting stronger and stronger. I feared expressing my anger as I didn’t want to appear out of control or sound like a bitch.

Most of us fear anger, fear that it makes us look horrible or out of control. Anger can be very hard to articulate the right words when expressing so can come out all wrong and sound worse than what we meant it to be. By putting pen to paper, you can get aggressive, get flustered, get annoyed and most importantly get it out of your head. That’s the biggest key, get it out of your head, get the reoccurring conversations out and down on paper, so you can free up the space inside your mind. Anger needs to be expressed or it can manifest into an explosion and create untold damage.

We need to stop fearing anger, anger can be a great tool. It can help you change your life or the world, help you know your passions, help make a difference, it can more you forward or even create new ideas. Anger in and of itself isn’t a bad thing, it the way we express it that can be the bad thing. Find a way to express your anger and feel the weight came off your shoulders. Remember sometimes we cannot fix what we are angry about, I know I can’t change or fix what’s making me angry and I need to accept that but finding ways to release that anger will help you stay happier in the long run.

How do you express your anger? Do you journal? Share with me your thoughts. 

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Monday, 13 July 2015

Vegan Chocolate Chip Mousse

Chocolate mousse is one of my all time favourite desserts (my other fav is Sticky Date Pudding) but I find it can sometimes leave me feeling a bit - yuck! Thanks to all the cream/dairy. So imagine my surprise when I found out you could create a dairy-free version with the humble avocado with the added bonus of it being healthy.

So on the weekend I had a play round with my favourite recipe making a few tweaks here and there and adding the extra fun of chocolate chips. OH - MY - GOSH!!!!

What resulted was heaven. So without further ado, here's how you can recreate your own.


1 cup dried dates - diced small - soak in water for 10 mins
6 avocados - diced
1 1/3 cups raw cacao powder
2 1/2 teaspoons of cinnamon
2 1/2 teaspoons of organic vanilla essence
12 tablespoons of coconut oil
Pinch of sea salt
1/3 cup cacao nibs

Combine all ingredients (except the cacao nibs) into a food processor then blend until combined and creamy. Once blended together stir through the cacao nibs.

Transfer to a bowl and refrigerate.

This recipe makes about a small glass mixing bowl size, so plenty to share with friends or a few days worth for yourself.

Enjoy
 
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